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Wednesday, August 16, 2006
13 of the stupidest things politicians have ever said.
From the book, The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said by Ross and Kathryn Petras, 1993.
- Things are more like they are now than they have ever been. President Gerald Ford.
- In every country the Communists have taken over, the first thing they do is outlaw cockfighting. John Monks, Oklahoma state representative.
- All along the untrodden paths of the future, I can see the footprints of an unseen hand. Sir Boyle Roche, Irish member of British Parliament.
- The United States has much to offer the third world war. Ronald Reagan, speaking about what the U.S has to offer the third world. He made this mistake nine times in the same speech.
- Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here. Vice-President Dan Quayle, giving a speech during a visit to Hawaii.
- I am in control here. As of now, I am in control here in the White House. Secretary of State Alexander Haig, after President Reagan was shot. He was actually fourth in line of succession.
- When shall the lion of autocracy walk hand in hand with the floodgates of democracy? James Sexton, Member of Parliament.
- Why can't the Jews and the Arabs just sit down together and settle this like good Christians? Overheard during a Congressional debate; also attributed to British politician Arthur Balfour.
- Get the thing straight once and for all. The policeman isn't there to create disorder. The policeman is there to preserve disorder. Chicago mayor Richard Daley.
- We're finally going to wrassle to the ground this giant orgasm that is just out of control. Arizona Senator Dennis DeConcini.
- Why would we have different races if God meant us to be alike and associate with each other? Lester Maddox, former Governor of Georgia.
- That's the most unheard-of thing I ever heard of. Senator Joseph McCarthy.
- You know, I've always wondered about the taping equipment. But I'm damn glad we have it. President Richard Nixon.
Posted at 09:56 pm by Joe_the_Troll
 | Posted by Paula @ 08/16/2006 10:57 PM PDT | | | "Sure, I'd love a blowjob." | |
| Posted by Cheezy @ 08/17/2006 01:28 AM PDT | | | I've reckon that particular sentence has always been an eminently sensible thing to say, Paula! It's served me well anyway.... ;) | |
| Posted by nat @ 08/17/2006 05:55 AM PDT | | | I love that these are ALL politicians! (at first I was surprised there were no Yogi Berra quotes, but hey, ALL of his quotables are stupid!) | |
| Posted by Joe the Troll @ 08/17/2006 07:18 AM PDT | | | There's a special Yogi Berra section in the book these came from. | |
| Posted by Fez Monkey @ 08/17/2006 08:59 AM PDT | | I'm surprised "Mission Accomplished" didn't make it ... sure, maybe it was just on a banner, but still.
Oh, better yet, "Bring 'em on."
Stupid. Oh yeah. | |
| Posted by Jeff Kos @ 08/17/2006 09:03 AM PDT | | I can't wait for the revised addition to the book you're getting these from, the one with the special section on W.
"There's an old saying in Tennessee. I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee, that says: Fool me once... shame on...Shame on you...If fooled, you can't get fooled again." | |
| Posted by Joe the Troll @ 08/17/2006 05:13 PM PDT | | | Don't be surprised, Fez. The book was published in 93, and had no Dubya or Clinton. | |
| Posted by jollykay @ 08/17/2006 08:22 PM PDT | | | okay, then that makes sense because w is the king of the stupidest things ever said. (i was surprised at the lack of w in your post) | |
| Posted by O'Tim @ 08/17/2006 08:50 PM PDT | | My fave is #3, cuz the absurdity took a second to hit me and then I was LMAO.
Do a back log search on Doonesbury for an archive of Shrubisms.
Nat, don't slam Yogi! Some of his are pricelessly witty.
On hotel accomodations: "The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase."
Upon being told he looked cool: "Thanks, you don't look so hot yourself." | |
| Posted by nat @ 08/18/2006 06:33 AM PDT | | | Chill, I wasn't slamming him! He's either a wickedly sly genius or a complete idiot, though. (and I mean that in a good way) | |
| Posted by Joe the Troll @ 08/18/2006 07:24 AM PDT | | | O'Tim.... I loved that one, also. It's stupid on so many levels. Number 5 has to be my fave, though. I saved the Nixon quote for last because it was the most ironic. | |
| Posted by O\' Tim @ 08/18/2006 10:57 AM PDT | | | I think Yogi has a natural, as opposed to cultivated, sense of wit that puts him smack between genius and idiot. | |
| Posted by Tim @ 08/19/2006 08:04 PM PDT | | | I miss Quayle. God he was so stupid it was hillariuos! Even W. is smarter than him. | |
| Posted by Stef @ 08/20/2006 12:50 AM PDT | | | I remember that Reagan speech with the Third World War in. *shudders* | |
| Posted by bill @ 08/24/2006 08:30 AM PDT | | | tim, congratulations on your entry into the list. including a typo in a sentence that contains the phrase "he was so stupid..." automatically puts you in the top 25. | |
| Posted by Joe the Troll @ 08/24/2006 08:39 AM PDT | | | Ever misstype something, Bill? Is your name SUPPOSED to be not capitalized? Jeez, didn't making an issue of typos on the internet become something that mature people don't do a long time ago? | |
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Other Bridges to Cross......
